~*++*+*.BLaCkDiVa.*+*++*~

Good evening everyone.

It's Monday today. The weather's cool in the morning, warm in the afternoon and now slightly moderate.

I don't know what's the option to take. "Either I Stay or Leave with something else in hand". This has been bugging me since the day I started facing so much of issues in the place were I slogged half my life there. Initial stages were fantastic. Learning and understanding was much better then. Until an evil force entered the office, the hopes and desires of what I wanted to achieve ended.

Not saying I am Miss Perfect, who happens to say things against people and I don't blame myself for anything. I do blame myself, for choosing such a place to slog. I do blame myself for accepting the duties that BY RIGHT are not suppose to be done by me but by others. The others I would say happen to pass on to me because,

1. They have other issues to handle which happens to be very urgent.
2. They are just thinking that I am very free. (As if I am Damn Bloody Free!)
3. They just want to do their "personal" work.

Although I know (and you know), these things are kind of doing injustice to me. But then, working life is such where such idiots do have to exists. And I have no idea why.

Till today, I will never understand why I or we working humans must go through something which is called, OFFICE POLITICS.

There is always someone who always tells me this, "People cannot adapt to you, you have to adapt to them." But the thing is, why must I give a damn to adapt to people when they themselves don't adapt to others? Why must it be me only adapting to everything and not others adapting to situations and people? What kind of a biasness is this? This cannot be a one way traffic. Seriously.

I know life is never fair. But isn't this a little overboard?

Pardon me on the emotion today. It's an emotion that has been going on for some time. Untill some love ones are just irritated with what's happening to me in terms of the slogging atmosphere and also, I know that they just don't wanna hear it anymore. They don't wanna see me looking at my worst again.

I know it's barely even months, but am in a dilemma now. Stay or leave? That's the question in my head. A lot of thoughts are running on my mind now. Can't really tell because everything's jumbled up. I can't even express the thoughts in my head to myself even.

I need to rest. Really.

posted by ..BLaCkDiVa.. @ 8:14 PM